Dear Internet, Please stop blaming the calendar year for the events that displease us. “Fuck 2016” is the equivalent of blaming the inanimate bed upon which you’ve stubbed your toe. While you’re at it, please stop speculating on what the cause *might* have been before the toxicology report is complete. I get it, we all want/need answers and/or a villain (George R. R. Martin is not the author of any of these events, BTW). As humans, we need to direct (or misdirect) our anger in order to cope. I’ve spent enough years managing my own anger to truly understand this. Because of that, I know that such practices are toxic and they don’t help us to heal.
Internet, I’ll never tell you how to grieve. Do/Say/Act in whatever way you choose to process all of this. I’m just warning you to look out for toxic behavior. EVERY New Year’s Eve party has the same proclamation. “THIS YEAR SUCKED, NEXT YEAR WILL BE GREAT!” Think about it, if you say that shit every fucking year, in retrospect, you’ve never had that great year due to such a toxic proclamation. It’s not up to the number on the calendar to determine greatness. That’s up to us. We determine the greatness of the day/week/month/year.
What does it mean to say, “there are no bad days?” It means that the concept of good and bad are subjective. There are no good or bad events until we attach meaning to those events in order to label them based on our scope of experience. Good to me is bad to them. Bad to this team means the championship for that team.
Before you write off the idea that words have power is Hippy Dippy Granola talk, here’s a social experiment. Find a friend to complete this 60 day exercise with you.
Person A: List 10 things for which you’re hateful. List every irritant, agitation, pet peeve, and general grievance you can conjure. Make a list of the hateful 10, first thing upon waking, and keep a daily journal. Write how long it takes you to write your list, write down all of the standout (not good/bad, just memorable) experiences each day. Do this for 30 days.
Person B: List 10 things for which you’re grateful. List every pleasure, joy, peaceful experience, and general happiness you can conjure. Make a list of the grateful 10, first thing upon waking, and keep a daily journal. Write how long it takes you to write your list, write down all of the standout (not good/bad, just memorable) experiences each day. Do this for 30 days.
After 30 days, trade assignments and do what the other person was doing.
Do words turn to thoughts that turn to actions? After this 60 day exercise, let’s have a conversation about whether or not words have power.
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